As 2022 inches closer to the finish line, I think we can all let out a collective sigh and say we grew as people. Well, if you don’t count constant civil unrest, global flirtations with nuclear war, the ongoing pandemic still killing people, natural disasters destroying countless homes, and… Okay, just like last year, 2022 sucked.
We haven’t learned from our mistakes or grown in any sort of positive way. If Chris Rock getting slapped by Will Smith was the most talked about event in the US, you know we’re all going to Hell in a handbasket. But if we’re gonna talk about trivial pettiness, how about something even less important in the grand scheme of things?
It’s time to talk about the worst songs of 2022!
Being the bitter, nihilistic wet blanket that I am, dunking on the worst songs of the year is my Christmas. Despite the world being a disgusting dumpster fire, we can take solace in the fact that terrible music will always be there for us. Discussing cheap, anthemic battle cries for the weary can be like a proverbial escape from humanity’s hardships. Bagging on these soulless songs provides a punching bag where we can vent our frustrations without really hurting anyone. Unless you count toxic fans, but they’ll cry about anything.
Anyway, let’s take a look at some of the worst songs of 2022, and tell me if you can discern that ominous, underlying theme.
Red Hot Chili Peppers – “Black Summer”
I could write a month’s worth of articles about how much I loathe the Red Hot Chili Peppers. But I do have to give credit where it’s due. For better or worse, these dudes have been doing their thing for decades and have never totally fallen out of relevancy. And it’s usually worse.
In that sense, RHCP is kind of like Green Day. Both bands have done their proverbial thing for so long that it’s jarring and oddly hopeful when they try something a little different. However, “Black Summer” is both vintage RHCP and a terrible kind of new.
From the melancholy meandering guitar, wiggly bass noodling, and ratta-tatta-tatta drums, 3/4 of this song is paint-by-numbers RHCP. The “different” comes in the form of lead singer Anthony Kiedis’ new pirate accent. Just what is that anyway? I can’t tell if it’s a joke or appropriation.
Even stranger is how it’s the only thing that stands out in this miserable dreck. If I were a betting man, I’d say the band wanted the song to become a meme. While that’s one way to make a boring song memorable, it’s also kind of depressing, isn’t it?
Blink 182 – “Edging”
Was Blink 182 ever good? I guess, it depends on the size of your nostalgia goggles, doesn’t it? If you’re over 30, I would hope that most of the music you listened to when you were 15 makes you cringe. That’s pretty much the embodiment of Blink 182.
I’ve always thought there was something kind of gross about this band.
Men who are twice the age of their fanbase, ironically singing songs about their genitalia and farts. Is it ironic or unironic? Who knows? Who cares? This critique is applicable to NOFX, Weezer, Fall Out Boy, or any other popular pop-punk act of that era.
Anyway, Blink 182 has returned with their original guitarist/secondary vocalist and the older Millennials are losing their minds. Sadly, that means the guys in this band are 50. It doesn’t help that “Edging” is a bad song. Easily one of the worst songs of 2022. But it’s REALLY bad knowing they were too old for this 20 years ago.
Adolescent lyrics. Cheesy auto-tuned vocals. Uninspired musicianship. Overcooked production. Ugh, I just can’t believe this exists, and people are excited about it. It’s all so try-hard. These guys are old and still singing in this pre-pubescent nasally faux-snotty punk kid voices. Oh, and you know what? Travis Barker is a terrible drummer. Yeah, I said it. Cry about it.
Meghan Trainor – “Made You Look”
Straight out the gate, “Made You Look” is a terrible song. While it has a catchy beat, a sugary hook, and a seemingly upbeat demeanor, there’s something extremely gross about its wholesale adoption of AAVE (African-American Vernacular English). It’s also known as Blaccent.
Now, let me say this: I’m a white dude and I cannot and will not speak for any other race or culture. But seeing as Trainor is also a white person, I can tell you without any reservations, she is trivializing black culture with her accent. More than that, it’s the entire basis of the song. Does it surprise you how one of the worst songs of 2022 has to be inadvertently racist?
While there is nothing wrong with enjoying Black Culture, it’s an entirely different thing to use it as a joke. When white people (like Trainor) utilize AAVE, it’s essentially exploiting a harmful, stereotypical caricature. To make matters worse, this isn’t how Trainor speaks when she isn’t singing.
Let me get this straight: She emulates a stereotypical caricature when she wants to be “sassy” or “sarcastic,” but then she drops it when she sees fit. Sounds to me like she’s appropriating someone’s heritage and culture for entertainment purposes. How is that any different than the generations of white entertainers who performed in blackface? It isn’t. It’s not fun or cute. It’s harmful, exploitative, and racist. And this song was a TikTok trend! Yay!
Maneskin – “Loneliest”
Every 5 or 6 years, we get a new group of bros trying to “save rock n’ roll” by churning out an album or two of paint-by-numbers rock caricatures. Jet, The Darkness, Louis XIV, Greta Van Fleet, all of them interchangeable with their own cutesy individual quirk. Maneskin looks to be this season’s variant. They have late 60s hair-dos, wear leather pants, and make mildly suggestive throw-back rock songs. Lather, rinse, repeat.
First off, rock n’ roll doesn’t need saving.
Second, wearing eye makeup and making ugly faces isn’t going to amount to much anyway. But seeing as Maneskin is that particular flavor of the week, they might as well use down the full checklist of rock cliches. And it looks like they’ve reached the “slow ballad with a video featuring a funeral” portion of the list.
Well, Guns N’ Roses or My Chemical Romance they are NOT. Not only is this one of the worst songs of 2022, but it’s also like the rock n’ roll trope left pop culture and decided to put out a solo record. I think I just forgot what I was writing about.
Morgan Wallen – “You Proof”
It’s pretty wild how an artist can be outed as a racist and still have a successful career full of tours and hit songs. But this is country music we’re talking about. A genre so desperate for cultural relevance they’re willing to scrape the bottom of the gnarliest barrels. Or in Morgan Wallen’s case, he’s trying to turn the genre into something else and shortchanging vital ingredients.
On “You Proof”, the Mulleted Minion croons a medium tempo “imma drinkin’ cuz muh’ heart is broked” dirge. Packed with all sorts of processed downbeats and a guitar that sounds like a GarageBand loop, the song still sounds dull and uninspired. Coupled with a monotonous vocal line and laudable attempts at “rapping” (yes, you read that correctly), you get a nothing burger of nothingness.
I’ve already explained the why Morgan Wallen is still a thing, but for the life of me I can’t figure out the how.
Harry Styles – “As It Was”
It’s really not fair to label a song as bad just because it’s overplayed. But you know what? It’s Harry Styles. This critique, article, or publication will mean nothing to his superstardom so I’m gonna say what I feel.
“As It Was” is a boring pop song. That’s really the full extent of the review. It might be light, airy, and fueled on synth-pop goodness, but it’s all frosting and no cake. However, those same very reasons make the song so popular. Yes, I dislike Styles a great deal, but I do think he has enough charisma and style that he should be making better music than this. For example, “Music For A Sushi Restaurant” is a much better song and video, but I digress.
Just because a song is an earworm doesn’t mean it’s good.
It’s breezy enough for the kids to enjoy and nostalgic enough for the olds. Yes, that’s how you sell popular records, but is “serviceable” or “Meh, it’s okay” the sort of music we should champion?
Think of all the people that starving artists could reach with their music using Style’s marketing machine. I don’t even want to think about how much money was spent making this tune go viral. The notion of millions of dollars spent on a song that sounds like The 1975 covering A-Ha’s “Take On Me” makes me sick.
Leah Kate – “10 Things I Hate About You”
Just what we needed: another angry white girl countdown anthem. Leah Kate is definitely more GAYLE than Olivia Rodrigo, especially with the numeric countdown in the hook. But I still can’t tell the difference between them all, sonically or performance-wise.
Despite pop culture being filled to the brim with ugly breakup songs for nearly 100 years, the music industry loves nothing more than hopping on a trend and riding it until it dies beneath them. But now in the TikTok generation, those fads come in rapid succession. Oh, you experienced a breakup? Well, there’s a rich petty white girl with an anthem to fit any need! Like! Subscribe! Share!
Even her life story is the new cliche.
A spoiled white girl makes a song with her brother at home. Her rich parents (who own a record label/or radio station) get it played in every market with little to no work. Another instance of “Lather, rinse, and repeat.”
Leah Kate isn’t the product of the music industry machine. She’s a 3D-printed android of the algorithm. Empty and uncanny, they all look the same when they’re making ugly faces and flipping you off.
Walker Hayes – “Drinking Songs”
I love when music knows exactly what it is and has no qualms about it. If it knows it’s bad, reveling in it could be an anthem of liberation. But what happens when the artist isn’t in on the joke?
You get Walker Hayes.
Then again, it shouldn’t surprise us that an artist who went viral for making a bro-country song about Applebee’s fails to be self-aware. “Drinking Songs” is the epitome of generic, from its stomp-stomp-clap beat to the 5-4-1 acoustic chord structure. It feels like it was written by the same machine that made Leah Kate. Maybe it did?
This is the perfect opportunity to point out the glaring issue in contemporary country music: The songs are just lists of things. Sure, the appearance of simplicity has always been part of the genre’s charm, but these days, a country singer is either whatever Morgan Wallen is or a bro-douche naming off country-adjacent nouns. The lyrics to chart-topping songs sound like some sort of table game of MadLibs you play while waiting on your appetizer to arrive.
My God, it really IS all about Applebee’s! Hashtag boneless wings!
David Guetta & Bebe Rexha – “I’m Good”
How is it that one of the worst songs of 2022 is actually a remake of the worst songs of 1999? Although it’s admirable to tear away every other element that made Eiffel 65’s “Blue” a terrible song, a man can’t live on the hook alone. Or can he?
This gaudy cover of an astonishingly bad song has been retrofitted for TikTok videos that celebrate privileged people on their way to a beach party. You could also use the track to make the kids who can’t go feel terrible about themselves.
That’s right! We can weaponize the algorithm! If you’re ugly and poor, you don’t deserve to have fun! Genetic lottery winners ONLY!
I don’t really know much about David Guetta or Bebe Rexha, but nothing about this song encourages me to check out their other creative endeavors. Even the music video showcasing Rexha seducing the viewer on a yacht or bouncing around in a mansion makes her seem more like a villain in a 007 movie than someone having a good time. Just who is this music made for? Certainly not me, Mr. Bond.
Drake – “Falling Back”
Despite everyone kinda hating him for various reasons, Drake doesn’t really let it get to him. He continues to make music that explores various genres, something I typically respect in pop artists. Unless they do it poorly or with no musical integrity
For example, Drake dropped a house album this year. Why? Boredom maybe? I don’t know. The lead single, “Falling Back” is a 5-minute dirge of digital sleepiness while he improvises mumbled lines of mush. It’s the kind of stuff you sing to yourself when you’re cleaning out the garage or raking the yard.
I guess it’s sort of poetic for one of the most successful artists of the decade to have one of the worst songs of 2022. The video features him marrying 22 of the hottest models Instagram has to offer. That kinda feels like a punchline doesn’t it? Drake could make a boring song and easily get with any of the girls in the video, yet here I am with $40 in my wallet writing an article about music I don’t even like.
I hate Drake and everything he stands for.
Taylor Swift – “Anti-Hero”
It always comes back to Taylor, doesn’t it?
Swift exploits relationships and makes millions off the songs that influence them. She sets herself up for criticism and then pouts about being the victim only to make millions off the songs it influences. Swift goes away for 5 minutes and has a comeback. You criticize her, it fuels her tirade. If you worship her, she’ll talk you into buying 5 more of the same record you’ve bought twice before. You ignore her, the more powerful her comeback is.
It’s just a sickening, eye-rolling, perpetual cycle of an overpowered entity.
While I can’t deny she is a hard-working marketing machine who knows how to play her fanbase like a fiddle, it’s getting more and more obvious Swift is the final boss of the music industry. I’m just kinda tired of writing about it to be honest.
With “Anti-Hero”, Swift takes the time to finally acknowledge her toxic traits, blistering narcissism, and superiority complex. But what does she do? She makes it quirky, fun, and with the most sickening, stomach-churning wink at the listener imaginable.
Even the hook, “It’s me. Hi. I’m the problem” is a joke anti-Swifties have been meme-ing for years.
What negative thing can you say about someone if they beat you to it? Nothing I guess? But that’s the point. Swift’s brand of ownership means justifying the sort of pettiness and personal branding that would get any other person flushed down the toilet into the city sewer.
There’s nothing about this song that’s the least bit interesting either. Just downtempo beats, generic synth pads, and a paper-thin chorus competing with Swift’s own paper-thin voice. I wish it were better so I could pat her on the back for pseudo-owning her toxicity. I wish it were worse so I can hate it even more than I already do.
For that issue alone, Taylor Swift gets my award for the worst song of 2022. However, she isn’t the anti-hero: she’s the villain, and we’re all just very very tired.
If you made it through my scathing critiques of the worst songs of 2022, you might see an underlying theme. Each artist created a song relying heavily on a well-placed, perfectly timed 15-second hook. (The RHCP song just sucks, so that doesn’t count.).
I don’t want to come off as a grumpy conspiracy theorist, but it’s almost like each track was made with TikTok in mind. If not TikTok specifically, the tunes possess a strong emphasis on meme bait. I get it: it’s a popular social media platform all the kids are using, but what does it say about the art built around it?
I love a good hook. We all do!
But it’s a little concerning when an artist goes beyond writing a catchy song and manufactures something just so people can chop it up and make silly videos with it. These concerns aren’t limited just to new or young artists either. Established mainstays are getting into the game, some with decades of industry experience.
It’s hard out there and I’m well aware of how artists need to explore every angle for relevance, but at what cost?
Now don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying that using TikTok can’t provide great exposure. And I’m definitely not saying any artist utilizing it can’t be talented. That’s not the case. I was blown away by the stage presence of YUNGBLUD and Mothica at this year’s Riot Fest, and that’s just one example.
There’s nothing wrong with making use of social media in general. However, it’s a little disheartening to see established artists chase this particular business model. It’s worse than a focus group or an algorithm.
Social media is imploding, we’re all suffering from over-exposure, and our attention spans are shrinking. Instead of forcing artists to get creative in a competitive field, they’re getting desperate and collapsing under fleeting relevance.
The worst songs of 2022 should be due to the songs being boring, uninspired, or just plain bad. It shouldn’t be because playing it safe. Haven’t we learned that following trends for relevance in place of artistic growth are surefire ways to fail? Artists are taking it on the chin, and it’s the listener who loses. Just because pop culture is dead it doesn’t mean we have to pee on its grave.