Another Easter is slamming down this upcoming weekend, which means it’s a good time to reflect on Jesus, the sacrifice he made and how I’m better than him in every possible way. In my quest to recommend the coolest music, I checked out over 100 albums this week, a sacrifice I assure you Jesus never made. Nor does he mention cool bands anywhere in his “teachings”, which really makes you wonder whether the Bible is worth reading when you have Cool Stuff to read instead. And if Jesus is worth celebrating when you have me, some random guy who really likes recommending music he likes. If they one day kill me over my music recs, remember to turn the murder weapon into cool necklaces.
And ya know, let’s be honest here, they might kill me after this week because I managed to achieve the previously unimaginable. I’ve recommended cool music every…single…week…in…March. It’s never been done before, and to really punctuate this special moment in music history, our battle for Coolest Album of the Week came down to a noise rock band from Italy versus a noise rock band from Iceland.
While they didn’t win, the Icelandic band (Slugs) gets extra points for their level of don’t give a fuck.
As far as I can tell, they have no social media presence. They have no intention of promoting this dope album they made. I don’t believe they’re on a label. Their artwork and shit is cool. They didn’t write fucking anything about themselves or their album on the release. If I want to know anything about them, I will have to fly to Reykjavík and ask around. And even then — what if they just said that’s where they’re from to throw people off their scent? Can’t rule that out.
The other band? The one that won? Well, you’ll just have to find out more about that band once you listen to each and every recommendation on this list. Much like Jesus throwing the traders out of the temple, I am beside myself with anger at the mere thought that some of you might be skipping the recommendations and going straight to Coolest Album of The Week. It is your privilege as a faithful follower of this column to listen to every single thing I recommend. Otherwise, your ass is getting thrown out of the temple, kid.
Let us pray this week at the church of…
The Coolest Stuff of The Week | March 27th
Neighbourly – Outside 311
Genres: Post-punk, psychedelic pop, indie rock
Flamingo Bay – Mascara
Genres: Indie pop, indie rock, alternative
Sacrofuoco – Anni Luce
Genres: Post-hardcore, emo, screamo
腾光事务所 – D.L.C.
Genres: Indie rock, math rock, emo
Cruiserweight Champion – S/T
Genres: Punk, emo, post-hardcore
Klara Lewis & Yuki Tsujii – Salt Water
Genres: Electronic, experimental, soundscapes
Slugs – Þorgeirsboli
Genres: Post-punk, punk, noise rock
USA Nails – Feel Worse
Genres: Post-punk, noise rock, punk
People Skills – Subalternity Interlude
Genres: Alternative, abstract, experimental
Basic Shapes – Low Energy
Genres: Post-punk, punk, rock
LYSOL – Down The Street
Genres: Punk, Garage punk, garage
Basque – Pain Without Hope of Healing
Genres: Post-hardcore, emo, screamo
STREBLA – ANNEGARE
Genres: Noise rock, post-hardcore, punk, sludge
A timeless quality permeates through STREBLA‘s instant classic ANNEGARE, a feeling that this album could have been made any time in the last 30 years and held up on its own merits. It’s the kind of record that would have come out in 1994, and you play it in 2024 and say, “Damn, this sounds just as fresh today.” It’s the kind of record that comes out in 2024, and you swear it’s been with you your entire life alongside the other post-hardcore and post-punk albums that raised you.
The cover for ANNEGARE itself is almost like a muddy mirrored nod to Slint’s Spiderland, as if looking at a faded memory of a younger swimming outing, this time with an ominous choir of other children watching in the background. Whether this was a purposeful nod or not, the difference these album covers imply is apt. Both albums are dark, but ANNEGARE is ugly, never lifting itself from the sludge of human brutality.
Its beauty lies in its unrelenting pummeling of the soul and senses.
This pummeling starts, of course, with drummer Manuel Alboreto, who slams down on his kit like he’s trying to break open a horde of attacking demonic skulls. If he ever pauses for more than a few seconds at a time on ANNEGARE, I swear the demons will overtake and kill him, and we cannot have that. Not when this demon-murdering onslaught is what fuels the album, and gives it absolute life. Everything feels built upon a foundation of Alboreto’s pounding and fills, the way things come apart and come back together all upon these bombastic, skull-smashing beats.
Upon those beats, though, magic happens. Ottavia Farchi’s bass lines slither and churn, complimenting the drums and providing the perfect counterpoint that is the absolute chaos of the twosome force of Nicola Ditolve on guitar and Alessandro Francabandiera on synth/noisebox.
The noise these three can make is impressive, especially given there are few moments of respite to make the loud moments feel even louder. For the most part, it’s just loud, loud, loud. For a lot of bands, the loudness of an album starts to lose its impact without a greater dynamic range, but STREBLA isn’t for most bands. The tiny breaths they take to let the volume die down for just a second give these songs just enough room to burst forth as ferocious as ever. Other times, it’s not needed at all. Somehow, the subtle shifts in song structure work their magic to let the relentless noise stay loud and proud throughout ANNEGARE.
And over top all of this, Ditolve screams in a language I don’t understand but I feel in the very depths of me.
His perfect hardcore punk vocals pierce through language barriers. These songs could be about anything, but they feel personal and treasured. I’m assuming because this came out in the US under The Ghost is Clear that it’s not something I politically or philosophically oppose. At some point, I’m going to look up the translations for these songs, but for now, I like projecting my own anguish and horrors onto the often inhuman wails Ditolve spews into each track.
As I finish writing this article, I have just received news in my day job in the maritime industry that a ship has crashed into the Francis Scott Key Bridge in Baltimore, causing a collapse that has killed many. This album is playing in the background. Ships are drifting, awaiting new orders, or diverting to new ports as the port of Baltimore is effectively closed for the foreseeable future while they clean up the wreckage. This should all have been major news by the time this article drops.
It’s hard not to have a sickening feeling watching the video of the bridge breaking apart like brittle bones shattering. Some kind of awful serendipity had me listening to this album when I found out, when I watched those moments — the brutality of the music and the wretchedness of the screams matching the brutality and wretchedness of the bridge collapsing. The murky waters of the album cover pool darkly in the back of my mind.
ANNEGARE is special, timeless, awful, and wonderful all at once. It’ll be the soundtrack to a lot of beautiful and horrible moments in people’s lives, equally important in both roles and equally effective. And that’s why it’s earned Coolest Album of The Week.
